#realmomconfessions

My friend Anna over at Girl With Blog hosts Real Mom Confessions from time to time and I thought I'd share some today...

1. I don't feed Little Man breakfast. I let daycare do it.

2. My closet exploded- there are clothes all over the floor. Some clean, some dirty, some to donate. It's a hot mess.

3. After Little Man went to bed last night I sat on the couch, painted my toenails, and watched mindless tv. Never mind the dishes that needed to be done, the clothes that should have been put away, any half started craft project...

4. I'm a little jealous of a friend's new pregnancy announcement. We announced our first pregnancies on the same day (without knowing that the other one was announcing too!) and I'm feeling a little left out that we aren't announcing too.

5. I went to the Shania Twain concert on Monday night. Who has a major concert like that on a weeknight?! But I went, left Little Man at home with Mr. K and enjoyed myself with my parents & sister.

What's going in your world this week mamas?

Love, Mrs. K

Don't Worry, I've got this

Last Sunday's sermon really hit home. Normally, I have a hard time paying attention during the sermon. Since I'm on church staff it's easy to get caught up in other things going on in the building- I'm thinking about Sunday school teachers & curriculum, I'm thinking about my children's message or announcements, I'm thinking about confirmation & who I need to grab quick after the service to tell them something, I'm reading the announcements in the bulletin to check for my spelling errors. And if all of that didn't distract me enough, I also have a very active 11 month old boy to chase around. I'm tired just typing that.

But last Sunday, Pastor Chris started with 'Have you ever had a plan and then everything that could go wrong did?' I stopped dead in my track, yes. Yes that has happened to me. He went on to share a story from his days in youth ministry and a trip he took kids on out to Seattle. They were met with hurdles every step of the way. Trains were late, baggage checks were questionable, transportation to the train station was unreliable, and then the return trip was canceled. Yikes. But a theme came from this trip, a theme of 'don't worry, I've got this.' Everyone that they talked to on that trip about a plan B was more than accommodating, super helpful in making things actually happen. Pastor Chris then went on to liken the theme of 'don't worry, I've got this' to Jesus. And when we don't feel like we can do things, it's ok. Because we don't have to do them alone.

Fast forward to Sunday afternoon/early evening. On top of my crazy Sunday mornings, we are just gearing up for harvest season on the farm. Which means that Mr. K works long, crazy hours. So he left for work before we left for church and he didn't get home until after I had put Little Man to bed. Which means that I was single mom-ing it all day. And Little Man is teething (at least I hope he is, it would explain his attitude!). There were two hours that afternoon where all he did was cry. He cried if I set him down, he cried if I held him, he didn't want his bottle, he didn't want toys, he had a clean diaper. Mommas- you know this moment, the one where you think you're going crazy?! At one point I was in the nursery with him, in the dark, laying on the floor so that he could lay right next to me, and we were both crying.

In that moment I felt totally defeated. Then something awesome happened. The morning's sermon came rushing back to me, I felt a sense of peace knowing that I wasn't alone and I hadn't been defeated. All of the sudden I felt like God was saying 'don't worry, I've got this'. Little Man didn't stop crying, he didn't calm down and go right to sleep for me, but it was the boost that I needed to know I could keep doing what I needed to do. Eventually he calmed down and fell asleep, then I did too.

Love, Mrs. K

So What Wednesday!

Here's the things I'm saying 'So What' to this week...

*if I hate my winter jacket?

Ok, I don't actually hate it. I'm very fortunate that I have one that keeps me warm, and it isn't super ugly or anything. But I hate wearing it. I avoid it at all costs. Super good role model, I know.

*if I felt like I had the biggest 'mom-fail' this morning?

When I dropped WD off at daycare he had spit up on his shirt to the point that he needed to be changed, he needed a new diaper, and he was hungry. Sorry Miss Carol, I promise I take care of my child!!

*if I haven't blogged in a long time?

No excuses, it's just how life is now.

*if I took the plunge & finally bought a 'big girl' camera today??

I saved my Christmas money & waited for it to go on sale. Now hopefully I can take some great pictures of my little guy :)

*if I love McDon's french fries?

Again, no excuses.

What are you saying 'So What' to this week?

Love, Mrs. K

The Best Year, EVER!!!

It's a bold statement, I know. But 2014 was the best year EVER for Mr. K and I.

Here's a quick recap:

January- 

*We started off the year with a bang, on Jan. 2nd I accepted a new job (again!) and Jan. 23rd was my last day at our church in Fargo. It's a great church and I really, really wanted things to work out for us there. It was everything I thought I wanted, it's younger, they have vibrant worship services centered around awesome music, they have SO MANY young families but I missed the church grandmas & grandpas, I missed the history, I missed the hymnals. So when the pastor from OSL came and asked me to apply for this job, we decided I should go for it. Ok, it wasn't that easy. He asked me to apply 3 or 4 times in a matter of 6 months before we decided to go for it. Sometimes it's hard to see God at work in our lives...

*The Mr and I took an impromptu trip to Branson, MO for a long weekend. We literally decided to go at 6 on a Thur night, loaded up the car, and headed out. It was so much fun!

February-

*Pretty 'normal'. Settled into my new job. 

*Toured an apartment (above a funeral home!!) and a house (to rent).

March-

*Decided on renting the house over the funeral home apartment. Good choice.

*The house is actually right at the farm that Mr. K works at so he just gets to walk across the yard each morning, so nice for our gas bill!

*My high school girlfriends came to stay with us for St. Patrick's Day. I love being with them!

April-

*On April 3rd we found out we were expecting! Due the end of Nov.

So exciting!! I cried in disbelief, after 15 months of seeing a negative result you start to believe that it won't ever happen. I took the test in the morning and I told Mr. K that evening by giving him the Willow Tree Angle figurine that is a dad & baby. It's called 'New Dad', he opened it and said why would I need this?

A few weeks later we told our families, everyone is VERY excited. This will be the first 

grandbaby in both families.

*We did lots of work on the house- painted all of the room except for the living room. We painted all of the kitchen cabinets- there are 45 of them!! We tore the shower/tub combo out of our master bathroom & put in a tile shower surround.

*We moved into the house during Holy Week- if you work at a church DO NOT move during Holy Week. Such a headache.

*The father of my really good friend Katie from high school passed away early in April and his funeral was during Holy Week. It was a very hard service to be at, all I could think of was 'What if it was my dad?' I couldn't imagine how hard that is go through ever, let alone in your late 20's.

May-

*We send out announcements and told social media (a.k.a the whole world) that we're expecting. The response was overwhelming.

June-

*College roomie's wedding- So fun! We road tripped to Southern MN with some other college friends, went to a Twins game, did some damage at IKEA, laughed, ate amazing food, danced, drank (not me!). Such a fun weekend.

July-

*Family reunion weekend at the lake cabin, we just love going there.

*Spent every weekend on the pontoon, the weather didn't always play nice but whatever. Even in jeans & a sweatshirt, I like being on the boat. Hopefully WD will like it too!

*Took 11 high schoolers to Kansas City on a mission trip. What a week! We volunteered by picking produce from fields that farmers donate and sorting donations at a soup kitchen. We also got to go to a KC Royals game. And I got to see my aunt, uncle, & cousin who live just outside of KC and my grandparents who live in Southern MN when we stopped for lunch on the way home. The only downside was the bus ride. 10+ hours on a bus was a little much for this 23 week pregnant momma.

August-

*The first weekend in Aug. is always WeFest- this year was awesome! It was a little chilly but that's ok. The best acts were The Band Perry & Florida Georgia Line. I wore funny pregnancy shirts each day: 'Future Country Music Star', 'If you mustache, I'm pregnant', and 'I ate a seed'.

*August was baby month in our house- we set up Baby K's dresser from IKEA, I registered for baby at Target at WalMart, my belly popped & I really started to look pregnant (I think).

*We finished Aug. & summer with a friends weekend at my friend Ali's parent's lake house. So much fun to be with those girls! Poor Mr. K was the only guy though! 

September-

*I guess by now Baby K had taken over our lives, Sept, was baby month too! We got a crib & car seat/stroller combo- Thanks Grandmas!! I did a bunch of work in the nursery, and my sister & sister in law had a baby shower for us.

*We finally got things finalized at work for my maternity leave. I'm happy with the agreement and so is the church.

October-

*Mr. K was hard at work harvesting. It was the best beet season they've had in years. They got all of their beets out of the fields in 8 days- it normally takes 2 or 3 weeks to get them all out because of the weather & moisture but this year the stars aligned and everything went super smooth.

*Oct. 13th I went in for a regular doc appointment and my blood pressure was super high- so high that I had to go to the hospital for a while that evening. They did let me go home that night but put me on bedrest at home. BP never went down again, I got put on meds & was instructed to stay home and lay on my left side as much as possible.

*Oct. 24th I woke up at 1:30 to go to the bathroom and my water broke. We went to the hospital around 3:30, got settled in our room, and WD got here just after 8 am. We were 36 weeks on the dot, I was a little nervous because I knew that 37 weeks was considered full term but the nurse that checked us in said that any time your water breaks after 35 weeks it's better for the baby to come out than it is for the baby to stay in.

*Oct. 26th we got to come home!! And daddy went back to work the next day.

November-

*So many firsts! Photo shoot, Thanksgiving, meeting great-grandparents, meeting a dog, going to a restaurant, going to Zorbaz, toys & playmats, craft show (x2!)

*We left WD with someone else for the first time! On the 26th Mr. K and I went to a retirement party for a guy from the farm and my parents came over to watch WD. It was so weird to leave the house without him.

December-

*More firsts!! Christmas tree, meeting Santa, worship at OSL, CHRISTMAS!!

*The Mr and I left him with my friend Lacey one night so we could go out to dinner for our anniversary. It was still kind of weird, but it was good for us to go out without him. I felt off kilter just carrying my purse and not the whole diaper bag.

*Dec. 29th was my first day back at work. It hasn't been as hard as I thought it would be, but I'm sure next week will be more difficult- next week he starts daycare! This week he's just at home with daddy.

Uff-da! If you're still reading- sorry that was anything but the quick recap I promised!! 

But it really was the best year yet!

Love, Mrs. K

... Maybe Christmas means a bit more

I have always loved that line from 'How the Grinch Stole Christmas'.

'Maybe Christmas doesn't come from a store, maybe Christmas perhaps means a little bit more'

This year Christmas meant a bit more to me.

We welcomed William David on Oct. 24th at 8:07 am! And he is perfect!

But he changed Christmas for me.

Suddenly I had a new appreciation for, and connection with Mary when I heard the Christmas gospel in church. It actually brought me to tears in church. The journey to Bethlehem suddenly seemed bigger, more stressful. I could never imagine traveling as far as Mary & Joseph did (and in the way that they did- hello donkey!!) with a baby on the way. Then to give birth to her first born son in a stable and lay the new born baby in the manger, I just gave birth to my first born son.

I also felt my appreciation for Mr. K being renewed as I heard the story. I knew that Mr. K was like Joseph, that he would do anything for his son and that they both want the best for their children. It's been a joy to see Mr. K interact with our little man, but as the daddy he is always wanting to do what's best for the baby. Worried if he's warm enough or too warm, or if he's hungry, or what the best kind of formula is, the list goes on and on.

Since day one we have done things on WD's timeline.

He showed up four weeks early. And in a hurry.

He reminded me of this on Christmas Eve. My favorite worship service of the year is the candle lit service, the last service on Christmas Eve. And my favorite part of that worship is when everyone gets their own candle to light and we sing Silent Night. We were barely through the first verse when WD started to cry & scream. I handed my candle to Mr. K and headed for the back of the church. But that wasn't enough either, WD still cried. So to the library we went.

And we both cried.

He cried because it had been a long day (2 worship services, 2- 1 hour car rides, meeting new friends, Christmas with one set of grandparents, aunts, & uncles), he cried because he was hungry.

I cried because I knew my life had changed. Because it's no longer about what I want, what my favorite things are. It's about WD now, and what's best for him. I cried because I felt an intense connection to Mary and how she must have felt on that first Christmas Eve as her newborn son was crying, not knowing why he was crying and only wanting to make it better for him, to make him comfortable.

And I cried because as I was making my way to the back of the church, the athletic director from our high school, who was ushering with his family, stopped me to give me a half hug and tell me that I had a beautiful baby. Even as he was crying during Silent Night he was still beautiful.

Thank you Rick.

This seems like a fitting place to share our Christmas card

We hope you've had a very Merry Christmas season and we wish you all the best in 2015!

Love, the Knopf family